It may only be Tuesday but already this week....
...I've had an altercation with a kleptomaniac - see below!
...my laptop 'crashed' on me - this time for good!
...I assisted Frou Frou in the rescue of an adorable stray young cat who has now been rehoused -also see below.
...I managed to crawl out of bed at 4.30am. in the freezing cold to drive two hours to a huge brocante.
...saw a man's "hoo har" standing in a bottle of formaldehyde, it having been surgically amputated (ouch!!) during the 19th century!
...I almost fainted with shock when, after asking the price of a single 19th century tassel, I was told it was 1000 euros - and the seller seemed totally insulted when I walked away without buying it!
...I ran out of anti-wrinkle cream - which means I might wake up tomorrow morning with a face like a crinkle cut crisp!
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Returning to the cat..... Frou Frou and I were coming out of the village Zumba class when this adorable young cat appeared. Flea ridden, starving and with no fur on her paws ( the cat that is, not Frou Frou!) we were giving her a stroke when a local man told us that the she had been wandering around the village for 3 weeks and didn`t have a home. The cat looked Frou Frou in the eye and knew she could win her over. So, with cat in the car curled up purring on Frou`s lap off we went to visit the vet in the nearest town.Parking up at the vet's surgery I recognised on the other side of the road a tall unkempt man who wanders about the town quite frequently. He is harmless and well cared for but he is also a well known kleptomaniac - and all the locals know that they have to lock their cars; he has a habit of trying to open car doors!
Just as we were about to enter the vets I saw the man bend down, try to open the door of a parked car and, finding it open, began to delve inside. I knew I had to stop him, so I began to cross the road towards him with Frou Frou saying " No....Mum....don`t do it, he may be dangerous!"
As I approached him I could see him holding a handbag which he then turned upside down, emptying the money out of a purse and grabbing a bunch of keys. The money and credit cards held no interest for him.....he simply wanted the keys!
I knocked the car window but he ignored me so I had to go around to his side of the car. The poor man jumped to attention and threw the keys back in the car. All I could think of to say was " Non monsieur....c`est pas bon!".
Much to Frou Frou`s amusement he mumbled something at me and went to sit on a nearby bench to sulk. I felt so sorry for him I almost went home to find him some keys!!! I assume he may have thought I was the car owner.
Attending the brocante today was wonderful; despite the cold I returned home with a car brimming with delicieux treasures.
And finally.... the "hoo har" in a jar? Well .....all I can say is why? Whose was it? Will anyone ever buy it?!! Also, just as we were leaving the brocante there was a huge smash at the stall where the 'item' was being exhibited. The whole glass panel on the display cupboard had smashed. Does that mean it has escaped and is on the loose? Will it hide out in a hedgerow and jump out on some unsuspecting woman?
As for the cat...she has been treated for fleas, wormed, innoculated and is living a life of luxury at Frou Frou`s cottage.
Should I spend the rest of the week hiding in an armoire as I wrinkle?
A la prochaine, mes belles
xx
Bet the hoo har had more wrinkles than you ( or me).
RépondreSupprimerPlease stay as lovely as you are and keep out of the armoire, unless truffling for treasures of course! Cx
LOL I feel so much better about my week already! Thanks.
RépondreSupprimerWhat a start to the week Shirley! and a mans 'hoo har' pickled for posterity....oooer Missus (said in my best Frankie Howerd) So glad the little puss has found a lovely home with Frou Frou.
RépondreSupprimerJo xx
Sharing your French life is so very amusing. All of it so strange but lovely as well. A hoo har in a jar has Lorena Bobbit written all over it. LOL
RépondreSupprimerLucky kitten, that made me smile.
ohmygoodness...you have me laughing out loud over here!!!! What a wonderful post and so, so FUNNY! xxoo, Dawn
RépondreSupprimer