Actually it wasn`t a hoot at all !!!

Well ........that`ll teach me to moan won`t it?!!! You know that old theory - that pleasure has to be evened out with a bit of pain? So.. if I enjoyed having a good old moan on Saturday then the events of the next day most definitely evened it out!

We got up early on Sunday morning for the flea market and drove off in the pitch black. Just a few lanes away from the house there was a sudden thud on the windscreen, something white splatted the front of the car, hit the front winscreen, bounced up onto the roof and into the darkness.  After the initial shock of the thud all I could think was "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO..... not an owl............ please!!!!".

We stopped the car and looked in the road and along by the hedges but could see nothing, so we started back on our journey feeling very downhearted at what had happened.


10 miles down the road we stopped in the nearest town at the 'distributeur' (cash point). Whilst Mark began to take out some cash I decided to get out of the car to take my coat off. I glanced at the roof and almost jumped out of my skin! There twisted over the luggage rail on the roof was a large barn owl. It was quite obviously dead so Mark managed to untangle it and left it in the bushes by the bank for nature to take its course and we sadly got back in the car to finish our journey. As we pulled away the feathers ruffled in the breeze - and I was absolutely bereft that this wonderful bird's life had ended in the manner it had. 

The flea market was a good one -  and I found some really pretty old treasures but I still felt quite downhearted by what had happened. We met up with Frou Frou and Mr Frou Frou who, after they had heard the tale, went off and bought me a present;  an owl paperweight presumably to torment me and to make me feel even more guilty...............as daughters' do!

As we set off I asked Mark to drive back past the hedges at the bank so we could at least pick him up and give him a decent burial in our garden. We arrived back at the bank only to  find this huge owl standing motionless right by the cash point!!! Mark said someone must have propped him up there for a joke.  I walked very cautiously over to look for myself - and then saw that his chest was moving!!!

Terrified of handling him we left him and drove straight to the vets...which, it being a Sunday, was closed of course and no emergency numbers readily to hand. The gendarmerie (police) and pompiers (fire) stations were our next call but, again, both were closed and shuttered. We rushed home and I managed to find the number for a bird sanctuary - which happened to be more than 40 miles away!

The  owner said that he was away attending a bird of prey exhibition  but if I could get the owl into a box and deliver it to him on Monday he would do what he could. He said I could, in the short term, give him some raw chicken meat if I managed to catch him.

So............ back to the cash point with a huge box and thick leather gloves to hand. We found him even perkier, trying to walk and flapping one wing! We managed to box him up and brought him home and placed him in the barns overnight - and safe, of course, from Charles le Baron du Breuil!

I fully expected to find him dead the next morning but no; there he was .......very perky, just able to hop on one leg, but clearly unable to fly.

So we have made the 100 mile round trip and he is now recovering from a broken wing in very experienced hands.

So pleasure........................................

followed by pain...............................

...........followed by relief!!

Oh heavens...the soap box is out again!

I had an email yesterday from a lady who I have never met or had any dealings with.  In essence, she suggested that, after buying a batch of antique textiles, it would be much better if I washed, pressed, starched and hand repaired them all before listing them to sell - and she scolded me for not doing it!

With that in mind I suppose this is her idea as to how my day would pan out.....................



I woke up gently at 11am to find a cup of steaming coffee and a freshly baked croissant amande at my bedside. I took a long luxurious bubble bath, took my time to choose what I would wear, fixed my hair and make up and made my way downstairs.

 Waiting for me in the salon were two people carrying bags full of wonderful 18th and 19th century textiles and treasures to sell to me. They had already laid them out for me to examine so I simply walked along the line and made my choice.

After they had gone I took a stroll in the garden with Sir Digbert Fanshaw Brownshaw and Charles Le Baron du Breuil . Oh... how we laughed and skipped through the rose beds in the warm sunshine.

 Two more sellers arrived a little later in the day, again with divine treasures for me to gently sort through - and then my buying was done for the day. 

I spent the rest of the afternoon being cooled by two servants holding huge ostrich-plumed fans whilst Mark relaxed playing the harpsicord and violin. Around me a team of servants washed, repaired and pressed my purchases. 

 I was carried to supper in a gilded sedan chair and then went to bed by candle light, but not before checking into the office to ensure that my two assistants were busy photographing my new purchases and preparing my Ebay listings for the following morning. What a divine dreamy day it had been.

This is really what happened.......................................


The alarm went off at 4.30am and I dragged myself from  under the covers. Digbert Fanshaw Brownshaw didn`t even open his eyes as I stumbled to the bathroom climbing into my jeans and loafers as I went. I brushed my teeth with my eyes still closed, threw a comb through my hair ( well the front anyway!) and went down into the cold kitchen.

Throwing on my coat,I grabbed the car keys , a torch and my 'buying' bag. I stepped out into the freezing cold and walked down the drive towards the car, flinching to avoid the bats which were still flying around. I realised as soon as got into the car that I had my sweater on back to front - but there was no time to sort it out now! I drove 50 miles or so through pitch black lanes and  badly-lit roads until I reached  the flea market where I spent  the next two hours walking amongst the stalls, searching by torchlight and fighting with the other dealers to see what could be found.


 I spotted an old trunk being thrown down to the ground from the back of a lorry. Half open, I could see it contained some old textiles - so I began to rummage through whilst holding my torch under my arm. I came out of that trunk much dirtier than I went in but I was clutching a couple of finds.  It was after 8 before I went into the local cafe for my first coffee of the day - but  I couldn't stay long as I had to get back on the road towards  my way to the next flea market  - and repeat the whole process again.


I got home after noon looking like I had slept the previous night at the back of a supermarche amongst the bins. Once the car was unloaded I immediately went into 'listing' mode - and spent the entire afternoon photographing and describing my finds.


So,....  Madame Wells now can climb onto her shabby chic Gustavian grey soap box and, to that rather ignorant lady, say the following.........


"No, Madam - excuse me. But I simply do not have the time to do as you suggest. I always sell my treasures just as they come through the door and, what's more, that`s how my buyers like them!"




At which point Madame Wells got down from her soap box mounted her ostrich and rode away into the sunset.............. 

(after which she had 120 macaroons and an eclair whilst being fanned by Johnny Depp in his passementerie- trimmed thong!)


A demain mes belles!!!

Dreaming of Blanchlands..................

This divine crumbling old chateau called "Blanchlands" has been on the market for sale for as long as we have been here........

It is huge......absolutely huge. It has immense grounds, its own chapel and magistrate's court , farm buildings, stables, servants' cottages, land as far as the eye can see - and the list goes on!

I know that it has the most amazing high-ceilinged salons and divine cherub-bedecked fireplaces. You may recall that I used one of the pictures for my blog header some time ago

It would cost a fortune to restore and then another fortune to maintain but, at dusk, I just want to sit at a candle-lit table by the lake in front of the chateau and watch the sun go down.

It even has a beautiful little shrine in the woods at the side of the road - silent except for the sound of the birds and the wind through the leaves.

The trees have little bird-house shrines filled with gorgeous plaster figures and rosaries............

...with old stone steps up to the shrine itself.

There is a bronze cherub at her feet almost worth being struck by lightening for if you tucked it in your pocket!!

I haven`t been inside the chateau;  just walked around the garden of prayer. I see there is yet another new estate agents sign pinned on the woodlands today............would I dare to ask for a viewing? What do you think? The last rumour I heard of the asking price - a cool 4 million euros!

Mark recently asked me what I wanted for Christmas this year and I told him.................... Blanchlands.    He was not impressed!

I can dream can`t I?

Bonne weekend mes belles

xx

Delicious doors!!

You may know that I have an addiction to old period doors and Mark looks in despair each time I arrive home with another one lashed on the top of the car as he knows that irrespective of its size he will have to make it fit somewhere!

He did threaten that if I bought another he would banish me to the cellar and bolt the door!!
But....................

..........I didn`t buy this divine 18th century rustic door....................................honestly I didn`t....I was given it as a cadeau or did I save it from the flames?

You may remember in a previous blog  titled" Will you be my neighbour?"  that I mentioned that the only neighbouring house here at Le Breuil was up for sale.
http://simply-chateau.blogspot.com/2011/05/will-you-be-my-neighbour.html

It has been empty since January and for the last 10 months or so I have walked across there to photograph wall sconces and all sorts of shabby treasures on a delicious old 18th century door that was hanging on one of the barns.

A few days ago I saw a plume of smoke coming from the gardens of the old place and went across to say "Bonjour" to our new "voisin" neighbour. Alain is a really lovely young guy who is moving back to Normandie from Paris to be near to his family. I asked him if he wanted to sell the door I love if he was not going to use it in the renovation. He asked me what door and as I turned to point it out I saw it was gone! After I explained he took me to a pile of old timbers ready to go onto the fire ......and there it was!


Alain couldn`t believe I would want "that old thing" and told me to help myself. Two days later it has taken three men to lift it and to help it cross the lane to the chateau driveway!

Wonderful thick old timbers.....divine shabby grey paint , big heavy wooden studs, old hand made keyholes and full of character..............

Sorry Mark but you know I just couldn`t resist it. Now......where to put it? If it cannot be put to use somewhere in the chateau as a last resort I will make a feature of it somewhere in the garden.


A trick that everyone abhors
In little girls is slamming doors.
A wealthy banker's little daughter
Who lived in Palace Green, Bayswater
(By name Rebecca Offendort),
Was given to this furious sport.

She would deliberately go
And slam the door like billy-o!
To make her Uncle Jacob start.
She was not really bad at heart,
But only rather rude and wild;
She was an aggravating child…

It happened that a marble bust
Of Abraham was standing just
Above the door this little lamb
Had carefully prepared to slam,
And down it came! It knocked her flat!
It laid her out! She looked like that.

Her funeral sermon (which was long
And followed by a sacred song)
Mentioned her virtues, it is true,
But dwelt upon her vices too,
And showed the dreadful end of one
Who goes and slams the door for fun.

The children who were brought to hear
The awful tale from far and near
Were much impressed, and inly swore
They never more would slam the door,
— As often they had done before.

Dearest Tartelette..................

Dearest Tartelette..............

MademoiselleTartface way over there in Oregon..your current silence is ominous!!

Usually you Skype me in the middle of the night or call me at 4am to tell me that you are my muse - and that you are sure that I cannot live without your imput into my shabby chic emporium.

But.....................you are so quiet that I am worried!!!   I'm just thinking what could have happened. Tartelette and Antoinette sound quite similar, don't they? Perhaps you have finally become Tartelette Antoinette?

Has Jeff whisked you away in a horse-drawn carriage for a week of unbridled passions?................or

...are you in the middle of a week-long Laduree macaroon binge?..................or perhaps....

 ...you have already overdosed on macaroons and  taken to your silk brocade bed?

Has your new crown detached itself from your tooth and you are in hiding?

Have you been lured to the woods by some scoundrel who promised to escort you to an early morning brocante?

Have you developed some kind of gambling addiction and you are in Las Vegas frittering away your brocante money?..or

..are you still decorating that Salle de Bains with the toile you cheekily spirited away from the chateau?

Have you taken up jogging?

Or are you simply having a bad hair day?

Tartelette.....................ou est tu?

Trompe l`oeil at the chateau...............

Our own renovations are moving on apace; my office has a floor, walls, new roof, a second floor with a staircase, large French windows that open out into the garden and the marshland beyond - and a rear door that opens on to the drive so that when I arrive home with new treasures they can go straight in! We are awaiting the arrival of our electrician Monsieur Patrick - and as soon as the wiring is in it should only be a case of plastering and I will be in! The new simply chateau HQ!!

Our new salon lounge also now has a floor, beams ready for a ceiling, windows, the fireplace is almost in situ and, again, once Patrick has finished the electrics it will be time for plastering - and for us to make decisions on colours and decorations. I change my mind almost daily! Pale French grey and white; creams and buffs with a touch of Aubusson green; decadent deep cranberry silks and velvets with a twinkling lustre chandelier....who knows where it will go! Just when I think I have made a final decision something crops up and turns my head again!!!

Today I truffled out the most amazing old 19th century prints of "trompe l`oeil" designs that had been sent to a local chateau for the owners to choose their decorations. Now they really did get my creative juices flowing for 'over the top' design ideas for the salon!

These designs were offered as designs for the chateau by a decorateur painter called Monsieur Glaise who worked in the late 1800s.

Can you imagine having an artist to paint these wonderful scenes..............

stunning faux drapes and tassels.............................

a balcony and garden scene........................

regal Republique Francaise flags with gilded finials.........................I could definitely see this above the fireplace!

Divine flower-filled urns and oil lamps................

There is no way I could ever find someone with those talents today so I have decided to keep a few for framing - and list the others on my Ebay site.

But ........if only...to have an outdoor 'champetre' party with a setting like this..................!

I wonder if Patrick has any other talents besides wiring?!!!

A la prochaine mes belles....................

Gateaux...........I NEED gateaux..............

Laduree Paris......

Oh! ...... how I NEED gateau..........................or macaroons.....................!!!!!

Angel wings...............

I so want a pair of these wonderful archangel wings......................

I`d wear them to the supermarche and sweep everything from the shelves as I walked past!

I`d have this pair for brocanting..........................

....a little easier to handle but still large enough to stop others peeking over my shoulder to see what I was looking at! I could flap them in the face of other early morning dealers!

I`d have this pair for being angry ( wouldn`t wear them very often I`m usually pretty happy go lucky!) or perhaps for eveing wear?

They`d be quite good for the opera in Paris.....they would have to give me a wonderful seat in the Royal box or I would block everyone elses view!

I`d have these small wings to wear under my coat so no-one would know I was wearing them but me! I could go to La Poste with my parcels with a smile on my face and no- one would know what I was grinning at!

....and I would have this pair just to show off in!

I think it was Coco Chanel that said "Get yourself fully dressed and then, before walking out the front door, pause by the mirror and remove one item "......so perhaps wearing a halo as well would be a bit too much?

I don`t know why or how I came across this wonderful website but I know what I want Pere Noel to bring me this year!!!

http://www.dragonwings.net/ArchangelWings.htm

Which pair would you like?

I am NOT going to grow up!

My mum decided to call  me Shirley after Shirley Temple............It is such a 1950s name and I always wanted to be something exotic and arty........Arabella, Benedict , Camellia, Carenza, Francesca, Esme or something like that.....Not just Shirl!

But like Shirley Temple........I am NOT going to grow up!!!!

Toussaint day........

Today is a bank holiday here in France. Our village cemetery is awash with flowers that families have left in remembrance of their loved ones past.

When I was in the Venice cemetery I saw this huge huge marble figure that towers above eveything else....

Perhaps the saddest statue I have ever seen.

But it seems a very fitting display for today.

A demain mes belles...